Archive for the ‘accountability’ Category
Stepping Out of The Vault (Raw Food Rehab)
At the beginning of the year, I joined Raw Food Rehab, a wonderful on-line resource for those interested in raw food, and checked myself into “The Vault.” The Vault is one of the site’s private rooms – meaning that it’s members only – where you can go to get extra accountability for your weight loss and health goals.
Penni Shelton, the cruise director, if you will, routinely organizes 11 Week Health Initiatives that encourage members to eat more raw foods in their daily lives.
She also posts wonderful recipes and inspirational videos that tap into the inner game of weight loss, and – on occasion – she encourages us to move our bodies.
Although all members of Raw Food Rehab are invited to participate in the 11 Week Initiative, the Vault-lings (as those brave people in the Vault endearingly called) actually commit to posting their before photos, starting measurements, and starting weight at the beginning of the initiative. Then, they are required to log their weight every week, upon threat (and reality) of expulsion. At the end, they post their after pictures, ending weight, etc.
Despite my own aversion to scales, I did this. And it was great.
At the end of the first 11 Week Initiative for 2010 I had lost 14 pounds; and I am now the smallest that I can remember being – ever! An additional and unexpected bonus was the number of good e-friends I made along the way!
The next 11 Week Initiative started yesterday, and after much soul searching, I decided to sit it out. I feel a little remorse about this decision. I also feel a little disappointment.
This disappointment, by the way, is directed not at Raw Food Rehab, the Vault, nor even my own performance during the last initiative.
Instead, this disappointment lies squarely in my own inability to see that the little number that appears behind a pane of clear plastic is not an indictment of my entire person, but is, rather, a tool to help me reach – and to maintain – my goals.
Essentially I have come to the conclusion that I am still too emotionally tied to the scale.
Although I know – rationally – that the scale is just an inanimate object, I still give it the power to mess up my day, if not my week.
This is particularly ironic, because given my current weight, I just don’t see me losing any more weight. More to the point, I don’t really think that I need to.
What I do need to do, however, is tone up and add muscle.
A little deeper personal excavation revealed that the real problem lies in the fact that I am having a hard time accepting – at an identity level – that I actually have reached my desired – if not ideal – weight.
What this means is that whenever I see the actual number, I freak out (and eat).
However, if the number goes up, I also freak out (and, you guessed it, eat more).
And, even harder to explain, if the number goes down, I also freak out (which manifests itself not in depression, anger, and disappointment [see above] but in joy, excitement and fear). Regardless of the emotional cocktail, the result is the same: I eat. Specifically, I eat until the number goes back up and it starts all over again.
It really is a no-win situation.
When I think about it, rationally, I can see that the chances of my gaining weight over the next 11 weeks are actually pretty high. Not that I am giving my permission to gain fat, mind you, but I do intend on adding muscle as I continue to work towards my goal of doing 100 consecutive push ups (I did 69 today, btw), and do yoga, K-Bells, and Jillian Michael’s 30-Day Shred.
So instead of focusing on weight, my personal goals for the next 11 weeks are to 1) stay in my skinny pants, 2) lose another inch off my waist, 3) tone up the crepe-like skin on my arms and thighs, and 4) rid myself of my limiting beliefs about what I do and do not (and should and should not) look like/weigh, etc.
I hope that I’m not just chickening out, but I acknowledge that that is a possibility.
Notably, this is the exact place where I lost my mind when I did Weight Watchers about 20 years ago, and then I still weighed about 10 pounds more than I do now.
I’ll be sure to keep you posted.
Until then, enjoy the day!
Getting Rid of the Shell, While Staying in the Game
Several months ago, I blogged that I had thrown the scale away and how liberating that was.
Well, this year, I joined the The Vault, a group over at Raw Food Rehab really focused and committed to adopting a more raw lifestyle. One of the conditions of being in the Vault is that you weigh in every week. I really had to ask myself if being part of the Vault was going to be worth reintroducing a scale into my life, with all of the craziness that that entails.
After much deliberation, I decided it was.
But the minute I stepped on that scale, my whole focus changed.
The first few weeks were good, if only because I was losing! It’s always good when you’re losing, right?
Then, last Wednesday, although nothing had changed in my diet (except that I had actually eaten somewhat less and exercised a little bit more), I was up a pound and a half. Hmm, not so good.
I think that the most important lesson I learned there (after I stopped sulking) was that I realized that I was going to have to put my money where my mouth was, as I had just spent the last two and a half weeks encouraging my less “successful” fellow Vault-lings that if they just stayed on the path, eventually their body would catch up.
Then, on Monday, I was up three and a half pounds! Ouch.
Then, on Wednesday, not only was that three and a half pounds gone, I’d actually lost a smidgen. I’m sure that all of the women out there (and any of the men who have actually lived with a women) know exactly what just happened, but I digress.
Today, given that my body has released a lot of the pent up gunk and goo that it had been holding on to, I feel totally thin. In other words, I feel like if I got on the scale, yet again, it would be something entirely different. And, chances are, something entirely better.
Then why don’t I? Good question.
Well, the scale isn’t in my house. It’s actually almost 45 minutes away (a two hour round trip once you count in parking, etc). I got up this morning, thinking, ‘I bet if I go weigh in, I’ll have lost more weight when I check in at the vault.’
Then the craziness started. I actually began creating excuses for going into town – all for the sake of a number. A number that, I have come to realize, has nothing to do with my greater path towards health and fitness. Nor does it have anything to do with what I put in my mouth over the week or with what I will put in my mouth over the upcoming weekend.
So, instead of driving 70 miles out of my way in the hope that I will be able to log in a lower number on my virtual community, I am going to log in over at Raw Food Rehab when the Vault opens, enter in my .10 weight loss from the week before and that will be okay. It will be okay, because the number is just that, a number.
And what am I going to do instead? I’m going to sit in the sun, blog, write and love on my ailing cat. I’m also going to figure out what I’m going to have for lunch tomorrow at Grezzo, where my love is taking me in honor of my 40th birthday. I can’t wait! (And I am most certainly not going to count calories)!
Have a great day.
Setting Goals and Seeking Support
Filed under: accountability, goals, relationships, social support, strategies |
Leave a Comment I’ve decided to go about setting goals in a different way from here on out.
In the past, I used to set goals, like “I’m going to lose ten pounds” or “I’m going to get into a smaller pair of jeans.”
In other words, I used to set outcome goals.
I also used to set goals that didn’t really change. In other words, I would set a goal and that was my goal. There was no reassessment. Once it was set, it was set. Like cement.
I would also set goals that only I knew about. And trust me, those are much easier to forget about than those that you’ve shared with others.
This month, I’m trying something different.
I set a couple of goals – that is, a couple of process oriented goals – and they are my goals for the month of February.
I also didn’t just tell myself what my goals are. I told someone else and asked him to check up on me. Instant accountability! How scary, uhm, I mean, how wonderful is that? 
And, believe it or not, it really wasn’t that hard. And the good news is that since they’re my goals for the month (rather than for a lifetime) I can assess myself in terms of my progress. I can either renew the goal or (if it’s become a habit or if it no longer serves me) I can choose another.
The day before yesterday I called Michael J from work and said, “I’d like to talk to you about some fitness goals at dinner and I’d like you to help me succeed. Would that be okay?”
Of course he agreed. I mean, who wouldn’t? It wasn’t like I was asking him to join me or anything? Right?
Essentially, we set down and I said: these are my goals for this month and I would like you help me be accountable.
He – engineer and wonderful partner that he is – actually wrote them down on a note card, which he then stuck promptly beneath the salt cellar.
I thanked Michael J for being totally awesome and supportive and then – like the absent minded professor that I am – promptly forgot about it.
Fast forward to last night at dinner: “Hey babe,” says Michael J, “how much water did you have today?”
What?! My knee jerk reaction: What’s it to you?!
Then I looked at the little card that he had in his hand with three enumerated points on it:
Drink at least 80 ounces of water a day.
Do yoga at least 3 times a week, even if it’s just 30 minutes.
Take vitamins every day.
Only slightly embarrassed, I did a quick calculation: “Seventy-five,” I replied gratefully, “and I imagine it’s probably going to take at least another five to take those vitamins that I forgot to take at breakfast!”
So, those are my three goals for the month of February: water, yoga, and vitamins.
I’m hoping that what “they” say is true and that it really does only take 30 days to make something a habit. Because, trust me, when I am doing these three things regularly without having to stop and think about them, there are plenty of more small, process-oriented goals ready to take their place…..
But until then, I have Michael J and his trusty note card.
By the way, if you’re reading: thanks, babe, you truly are the best.
Happy New Year! Live from the Raw Food Rehab Online Community
Filed under: Alkaline Diet, accountability, challenges, food, health, raw food |
Comments (1) It had been my intention to write a big year end blog and something motivating and meaningful about looking forward, but, to tell you the truth, I have spent almost the entire day over at some other woman’s site! Another Tulsan, mind you, but that’s beside the point.
If you’ve been following me at all these last few weeks, you’ll have noticed a new tag popping up on my entries: raw food.
After having recently gone gluten-free, my diet has taken yet another left turn. I think the correct term is “high raw,” which means raw until dinner. All that means is that I’m too big of a chicken to give up cooked food all together. I think that this topic deserves some thought, so hopefully I will be back online tomorrow with something meaningful and motivating.
Meanwhile, if you’re interested in what’s going on in Oklahoma (other than the two amazing raw food restaurants that I mentioned in my last post), go check out Penni Shelton’s blog. And if you’re interested in all things raw, you should check out her ning site: Raw Food Rehab. Or better yet, check out the video. Though be forewarned, it starts in the middle.
Or for the lower resolution clip in its entirely, see below:
I’ll have more to say on my own reasons for joining this year’s 11 week initiative next time!
May you all have a healthy and happy New Year!
Portion Control: Argh!
I’ve been trying a new strategy: portion control.
Well, not that it’s a new strategy in the cosmic sense, but it is new to me!
I’ve been listening to this weight loss/health gaining program and the instructor talks about learning to stop eating when you’re 80% full.
I purposefully let that awkward sentence structure slide – learning to stop eating when you’re 80% full – because, trust me, if you’re not used to doing it, you’re going to have to learn it. And it’s harder than it looks.
I had no idea that I was a member of the “clean plate club” until I tried not to be. What I found, when I tried to not finish my meal is that it’s a real struggle for me to leave a bite of food on my plate, let alone 20% of whatever I took…unlike my normal weight partner, Michael J, who always leaves a bite or two on his plate! You know, it’s a good thing he’s adorable, because, to tell you the truth, it drives me crazy. But at least not crazy enough, thank goodness, that I feel the need to clean his plate (with my fork!) as I’m putting dishes away! Apparently eating the scraps off of husband’s and children’s plates is a huge weight gain trap for women. So, if you’re doing it: stop it! Just stop.
I do, I admit, tend to eat the last bite out of a container if there’s only one – or two – bites left. Not Michael J, who will all too happily put a two bite “black bean snack” back in the fridge without even batting an eye. Something tells me that I could learn a lot about eating from watching him more closely – not necessarily about what to eat, but how to eat. Again, it’s a good thing he’s cute.
So, back to this 80% rule. Why 80%?
Essentially, it’s because it takes the stomach about 15 or 20 minutes to realize you’re full. So, when you feel 80% full (I still haven’t fully grocked what that means, exactly) you’re actually already full, although your gut hasn’t quite figured that out yet. If you eat until you’re full, technically you’re already over full (around the magnitude of about 120%) When you eat more calories than you need – that is, you eat to over fullness – your body releases insulin, which signals fat storage, etc, etc. I’m sure you get the picture.
Because I have such strong – apparently – cultural conditioning not to waste food (even two bites), my new strategy is to take about 80% of what I would normally take. And I try to eat slow…well, slower…so that my stomache is more likely to get the message before I to leave the table.
It’s really hard. Harder than it should be. But even though it’s hard – I actually feel better eating this way. I don’t miss the “stuffed” feeling, even though it’s been a good companion to me for the last 39 years.
However, as I mentioned in a previous post, I am going to commit to three changes this holiday season.
This is the first: I am going to walk away from every meal, snack, etc. while I still feel a little bit hungry. If I am still a little bit hungry 15 or 20 minutes later, I may have a little more. Or I might just have a cup of tea and let the feeling pass.
I’ll keep you posted.
Scale-less dieting
Filed under: accountability, goals, health, maintenance, strategies, weight loss |
Comments (3) I realized the other day that I haven’t been on a scale in two months. Actually, the last time was June 17, so technically it’s been a little over two months. That’s the longest time I’ve been off a scale in years! Does that mean I’m not dieting or watching my weight or maintaining (or whatever you want to call it)? No; it means I am dieting/maintaining/releasing without being tied to a meaningless number!
Given that most people who are actively involved in monitoring their own or others’ weight either propose weighing once a day or once a week, why would I choose to do it without a scale? More importantly, why would I suggest that you try it as well?
Practical whys first:
- I don’t have a scale. I always used one at the gym. When I started working out at home this summer, I decided that it just seemed silly to waste the gas and the time to go to the gym just to weigh myself.
- I also didn’t want to buy a scale, because I know that the one at the gym – which I have used diligently for the last five years – is at least consistent! I also have to wonder how many scales find themselves either being used as a doorstop or at the bottom of a landfill!
Once I got past the weirdness of not weighing myself, I found myself looking for other markers of success. Did my gut look bigger in the mirror? What are my measurement? How are my clothes fitting? Was the yoga easier or harder today? Was my heart rate up or down since the last time I did this workout DVD? How many days out of the last 7, 14, 21, 28 or even 100 did I have a calorie deficit (I may have stopped weighing, but I love counting calories; I am a total calorie geek)! When was the last time I had a high fat, high sugar dessert? How many weeks in the last 3 months have I had wine two nights in a row? How many times last month (I am also a big proponent of keeping track of exercise) did I do weight training in addition to cardio? Once I stopped focusing on the one number – which fluctuates like a demon depending on what I eat and the time of day, not to mention the time of the month! – it opened up space for me to also realize what really matters.
So, onto the quasi-theoretical whys:
- Once I gave up the scale, I was able to get real on what mattered and why. Does it really matter if I weigh 145 pounds instead of 140 or 135? Not really. What really matters is whether my clothes fit and the degree and frequency I am putting junk into my body. What also really matters is that I continue working on being as fit and flexible as I can possibly be.
- Giving up the scale makes it easier to forgive yourself when you make choices that don’t necessarily support your goals. That doesn’t mean that giving up on the scale automatically signs you up for a crash course in self-acceptance (as my post earlier this week revealed), but it does force you to seek out signs of progress, rather than setting your sights on a single number, which may or may not be attainable in a week or even ten days!
So, how do you diet without a scale? Easy. If you have a scale, toss it. If you don’t have a scale, don’t get one.
Now, I realize that if you’re going to Weight Watchers or some other organization that requires weekly weigh-ins, you have to weigh. But have you thought about asking your leader to write it down without telling you and leaving your card at the meeting place? Or could you trust yourself not to look and to put the booklet into it’s plastic sleeve (do they still even have those) and chuck it into your glove compartment?
I remember doing this when I was at Weight Watchers as a teen – mainly because I couldn’t stand it if I gained weight. I hated it and I hated myself (more on the dangers of self-loathing later). And, not surprisingly, when I was in that emotional space it was easier to want to give up. It was also easier to self-sabotage, because even though it was me I was talking about, why would I want someone I hated to actually succeed? Further, during the weeks that the weight was climbing no matter how rigorously I stuck to the plan (and there were many of those during my 90 pound weight loss if for no other reason than the body is very smart and extremely efficient at adapting to dietary changes and – you guessed it – storing fat!) there was something powerful (and not in a good way) about seeing the numbers – usually written in indelible ink – steadily rising. There was something about actually seeing the numbers get bigger that led me to believe that that’s just the way that it was. The plateaus seemed more real somehow. More insurmountable. But I digress.
So, once you’ve figured out how to be scaleless (if not in reality, than in consequence) pick the outcomes you really want to achieve. Do you want to consistently use more calories than you consume? Do you want to improve the quality of your skin? Do you want to add muscle mass and get stronger? Do you want to look good in your clothes or wear a different size? Do you want to be healthier or have more flexibility? Do you want to be able to walk up the stairs without being winded or to turn heads when you walk in the door? Do you want to get off of your high blood pressure medication or lower your risk of type II diabetes? Do you want to have a better hip to waist ratio? Do you want to run a half maraton – or a marathon – before your 40th birthday? Or do a triathlon before you turn 50?
These are the things that are important. These are the things that matter and therefore the things that will keep you on track! The number on the scale? That’s just cultural conditioning.
What’s really more motivating, weighing 135 or having the energy to chase your grand kids (assuming you have grand kids) around the park?
Then do what you need to do in order to meet the goals that matter to you. It may be counting calories, it may be consistently exercising. If you’re already dieting, just try taking a break from the scale. Don’t take a break from the diet, just ditch the scale for a while. And pick things that matter as your new source of accountability and motivation!
So, last Sunday, I told you that I’d tell you how bad it was – that is, my own diet detour into Mendocino County. You might be thinking, how the heck are you going to do that if 1) you haven’t been on a scale in two months and 2) don’t have access to one?
Easy. My gut looks smaller than it did on Sunday. My KJ Jr. size 16 girls Lands End pants are tighter than they were when I left. My sixes still fit so it can’t be that bad; however, to be honest, I haven’t bothered with the fours.
My American Eagle short shorts with a 2 (maybe 3) inch inseam still look like crap (so nothing new there).
I just bought a super cute form fitting Ann Taylor dress at a consignment store to wear to my cousin’s wedding.
My yoga routine was pretty darn good this morning and my heart rate seemed to be a little bit lower today during my cardio workout than it was on Monday.
And, yes, I told you I am a calorie junkie, a quick glance at my food diary tells me that out of the last 21 days, 17 had calorie deficits that ranged anywhere from -13 to -1016! Not too shabby!
I had been thinking about this post for a while but I held off from writing it because I thought, no one is going to throw their scales away! But then I bought this amazing book (title withheld until I have finished it) where the woman starts off with a pretty simple message: Get rid of the scale! I thought, awesome, I like her already! Her thing is that it’s not about losing weight fast, it’s about keeping it off for a life-time. As it turns out, this book seems to be full of little gems, many of which resonate with my approach, but many of which seem to supply the missing pieces that I’ve been looking for.
Once I finish it, I’ll review it and probably end up recommending it! It’s fun, it’s easy to read, and it’s only $27.00! And in terms of the quality of information? I got my money’s worth in the first three pages alone! When was the last time you could say that about a book?
So, off to read and I’ll keep you posted on how it goes!
The best laid plans of mice and men
Filed under: Alkaline Diet, accountability, challenges, exercise, food, travel |
Comments (2) Well, my intentions were good.
I’m writing this, really, as penance and to simply put it out there that I have off days (weeks) just like everyone else!
I missed exercise for two days. The first day was just insanely busy and then yesterday I stupidly let myself be talked into going to conferences and meeting people. You know what? I would have been much happier working out and I am pretty darned sure that my eating would have been better as well!
I suppose that when one is at a professional conference, you should take the opportunity for professional development and for social and professional networking. And it is true that I made a lot of contacts with publishers and got some great ideas for future projects while I was not at the gym. In that sense, I shouldn’t be so hard on myself. But not going to the gym seemed to invite over eating (and, in some cases, over drinking).
Prior to this conference, I hadn’t had more than two glasses of wine in a month, but it seems like I’ve developed a three glass minimum these days ;( Alcohol is a slippery slope when it comes to diet. Why?
One, alcohol is full of empty calories!
Two, alcohol lowers your inhibitions when it comes to food!
Three, alcohol lowers your blood sugar, which causes you to store fat (always a plus – not)!
Four, alcohol is highly acidic and once you start creating an acidic environ in your body, your body craves additional acid! In other words, you crave things like white bread, sugar, alcohol, etc. Essentially, once you get started, it’s hard to stop.
I haven’t managed to stop entirely, but I have managed to put on the breaks.
After a pretty indulgent day on Sunday, yesterday, I had my normal shake breakfast (even though hotel ice blends much quicker than ice cubes from a tray, the people next door hate me!), a bagel (highly acidic, but decidedly yummy), a beet salad with avocado and feta cheese, some cashews, a Lara Bar, a salad, some whole wheat bread sticks, and a plate of fabulous veggies (sauteed spinach, baby carrots, and grilled asparagus. (And , uhm, a third of a bottle of pinot noir – nobody’s perfect and we are, after all, in California).
I’ve been drinking my highly alkaline green stuff daily (sometimes three times a day!) but I feel like I’m losing the battle.
This morning, I decided no more excuses. Instead of procrastinating (or networking) I immediately rolled out of bed and went to the gym. All of the machines that I liked were full, but I hopped on the StairMaster anyway. An hour and close to 600 calories later, I realized that for the first time in two days, I felt like myself! I’m not saying that those 600 calories are going to change anything when it comes time to step on the scale when I get back home, but the psychological benefits were definitely real!
I literally danced my way back to my room, still plugged into my iPod shuffle! And even though tomorrow is our last day in a hotel with a gym, I am re-committed to move my body even if it means – poor me – a long walk on the beach!
(Notice, I said nothing about reducing the wine)!
Never eat standing up!
Remember that old wives’ tale, “It doesn’t count if you’re standing up”? Or was it just wishful thinking?
Regardless, according to Judith S. Beck, author of The Beck Diet: How to Think Like a Thin Person,” you should never put anything in your mouth while you’re standing up and that includes while you’re walking.
Why does it matter if I eat standing up versus sitting down?
Because people tend to eat more and more quickly when they’re standing or walking than they do when they’re sitting.
Although this seems like a fairly simple rule, you may be surprised how effective it can be.
For instance, abiding my this single rule practically eliminates the bad habit of tasting – otherwise known as snacking – while you cook!
It also has the potential to eliminate or at least drastically reduce the terrible habit that a lot of women (especially wives and mothers) have picked up of cleaning not only their own plates, but the plates of everyone else in the family as they clear the table after a meal!
Additionally, people who don’t abide by this rule are less likely to count (or even notice) the calories they eat standing up, at least not to the degree they are likely to do when they take the time to prepare a meal or snack and sit down to eat it! Dr. Beck also suggests, by the way, that you limit your eating to the dining room, which means eliminating eating at your desk, in front of the television, etc!
Never eating while standing up also cuts down on a lot of impulse snacking, including the elimination of store samples that on any Friday night in a reputable grocery store can add up to well over 500 calories before you even realize it between the goodies offered at the bakery, the deli, the produce isle, and the prepared foods section. And let’s not even get into how quickly the calories can rack when you stop for the four to six samples of beer and or wine!
Never eating while standing up also has the potential to cut out trips to the office candy jar! Because if you’re like me, if the candy doesn’t go immediately into my mouth, I can usually talk myself out of it before I get to my desk. Same thing with all of the office “goodies” that all of the would-be pastry chefs in my office bring in on most days that end in “Y”! However, if I do actually wait to eat something until I get to my desk, chances are that I’ve made a conscious decision to eat it and, thus, will record it in my food diary!
If you really want to cut down on all of the standing up calories that you consume without usually even realizing it, just stop and sit down. If you’re cooking, ladle whatever it is to a small measuring cup and go sit for a moment. Chances are the smaller amount will cool faster and you’ll get a better idea of what it really tastes like. And if you use a measuring spoon or cup to taste, you’ll be able to keep track of the calories! Unfortunately, as much as we’d like to think they don’t, the calories we eat standing up really matter! A calorie is a calorie, no matter what you’re position you’re in when you consume it!
Tip for the day: If you’re ravenous after a workout, don’t just grab a handful of grapes or chips straight out of the bag. Instead, take a deep breath, decide what you want, take a moment to count (or measure) whatever it is out, put in in or on a small serving dish, and sit down. Just by taking that extra thirty seconds you’ll increase your awareness of 1) what it is that you actually want (instead of just stuffing something in your face), 2) the calories you’re consuming and 3) the taste of whatever it is that you were hungry for to begin with.
If you really want to develop this habit quickly, set up a “tip” jar in your kitchen and/or office. Every time you find yourself (or, if you have a good support system, whenever someone else finds you) eating on your feet, throw a dollar in there. Eventually, usually about the time that you’ve developed the habit, you’ll have enough saved to take yourself (and probably someone else) to a nice sit-down dinner!
The little things and the unexpected shows of support
Filed under: accountability, goals, maintenance, social support |
Leave a Comment I had lunch today with two delightful young women.
One of them ordered her dessert first (so she’d have room for it), then took half of her seafood paella home! It was classic. The waitress blinked: You’re starting with the ice cream sundae?
Ah, to be in one’s twenties again! But I digress….
At the end of the meal (I skipped the sundae and stuck with my typical wood-fired vegetable spinach salad with salmon), they presented me with a small box.
Much to my delight, they had a necklace made for me, touting a message (or touchstone) that I had mentioned in a previous post: never more than today.
There’s even a four leaf clover charm for good luck, as “they couldn’t find one of a beet!”
It was a perfect gift. I absolutely loved it. But more importantly, and unbeknown to the givers, it came at a good time — a time when, for whatever reason, maintenance is becoming something of a challenge and I am having to rely more on alternative markers of success –that is, resting heart rate, the fit of my clothes, and tape measures to chart my progress.
So, thank you ladies, if you’re reading this. You couldn’t have given me a more perfect and motivating gift. I will cherish it always and do everything I can to live in accordance with its ideal.
Mixing it up and toning it (down)
Filed under: Jillian Michaels, P90X, accountability, exercise, k-bells, strategies, yoga |
Comments (2) Like most people, I am a creature of habit.
Over the last 30+ weeks, I realize that I have moved through 3 different phases of working out. In other words, whereas most people cross train I tend to do things in 10 week chunks.
Last summer, I was heavily ensconced in P90X. For those of you who haven’t seen the infomercials, it’s a total body program with a focus on upper body strength. I definitely lost inches, but not a lot of weight. In fact, I gained some, which was undoubtedly muscle.
In the fall, I continued on with parts of P90X (especially Yoga X) and added in really high intensity cardio — typically an hour on the tread climber or spinning, holding nothing back. I still didn’t lose weight — well, not much — but I kept the form.
In the winter, I dropped the weights and just went for the serious cardio — again, the tread climber and a spinning bike were my tools of choice. I was definitely in the more calories burned the better mindset. It was nothing for me to go work out an hour before teaching a spinning class! And more often than not, I kept my heart rate at the top of my aerobic zone or above. Indeed, around 3 days a week — at least — I was burning over a 1,000 a day in exercise. Eventually, however, I was also eating close to 2,000 calories a day in order to fuel my exercise habit. It was also easier to fool myself into believing that it was okay if I ate the chocolate croissant, because I had “worked it off”! In fact, what I was doing was starving my body of oxygen at the very times that it needed it the most!
Notably, I actually liked the hard exercise. I liked spending that much time in the gym. I liked the sweat and the stench of hard work. It made me feel like I’d actually accomplished something. What I didn’t like about it was that even with all that work, even with the consistent and often times steep calorie deficits, I still wasn’t losing weight. In fact, if felt like every time I had a glass of wine or anything at all, I’d glob on three pounds before it even got past my taste buds!
During the spring (since mid March), I switched modes. I stopped working out at a break neck speed. I started spending the bulk of my time at the low end of my aerobic training zone and I started implementing real warm ups and cool downs. Essentially, I started doing what people had been telling me for years. 10 minute warm up, 40 minutes in your training zone, and 10 minute cool down. Guess what? I started releasing weight. Not only did I start releasing weight, I did it in about half the time and with less wear and tear on the joints.
At first, when I started working out at 130-150 beats per minute (my real target zone) I thought: What a waste of time. This isn’t doing anything! But I was wrong. It did do something. I released the weight and it’s been easy to keep it from coming back. Granted, there have been minor bumps in the trend line, but nothing major. If you look at the trend line, it’s been slow and steady. In fact, I’m still releasing weight — though not nearly to the degree that I was in March and April. And that’s fine, because I don’t need to release it that fast. Indeed, I am actually at the point where I’m not sure if I need to release any more at all. Never thought I’d be in the position to say that before! (Which is probably why it never happened!)
Which brings me to my next 10 week cycle.
Despite my deep passion for cardio, my plan is to minimize its role in the next phase of my exercise career. I hope that by writing it down, I will commit to an even lower keeled routine for a while. One that includes some cardio (maybe every other day instead of five to six days a week and for maybe 30 minutes instead of an hour) and centers, instead, on a maintenance-oriented routine that includes toning, k-bells, and yoga. I’m thinking that yoga (60 to 90 minutes) and toning every other day would be a good thing.
My inner cardio-queen cries out in agony: Don’t do it!
The shift from weight loss to maintenance and overall fitness is challenging. Psychologically, it just feels wrong to exercise for an hour and a half to only burn 220 calories — my typical results after 90 minutes of flow yoga poses and balance postures. But I’m going to do it. As soon as spinning ends (June 11), it’s me, Michelle, Tony, and Jillian. Talk about changing your peer group!
Consider this my public declaration of commitment.
Men’s Health
Filed under: accountability, cultural, goals, maintenance, motivation, relationships, strategies |
Comments (6) Every year, MJ comes home with a “popular magazine” as his way of tuning into what’s going on in the world. Last year it was Cosmo (which we read together on the couch and laughed so hard we couldn’t take it anymore)! Thank God mother never let us have that in the house. Harlequin Romances, yes. Cosmo, no.
This year, it was Men’s Health, which, as it turns out, is the male version of Cosmo. Seriously, it was all about sex, nutrition, and exercise. And, more to the point, the headlines were almost identical: 125 Best Foods for Men, No-Diet Weight Loss Plan, 30 Red-Hot Sex Secrets, Strip Away Stress, 7 New Rules of Money & Women, Great Abs Made Easy, Melt Away Pounds! 15-Minute Fat Burners, Look Your Best Now! Interestingly, they also have a number of “Short Order Cook Recipes.” They’re obviously designed to impress a date, but they look pretty good. There are also a couple of other random tips in there that I may pass on later.
But the most interesting thing in there by far was an article — that looks like it be part of a series — called, It Works for Me: Master Your Domain.
This segment, or this month’s feature, was on actor Tyrese Gibson.
“Tyrese Gibson, star of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, gained weight and lost motivation. To right himself, he first had to change everything around him.”
On Maintenance:
“He lost his sense of consequence, he says. It’s easy to do: Accomplish something and your attitude can go from I’m working hard for this to This is mine. Do that and you’ve already failed. A boss doesn’t promote you because you did work hard. A woman doesn’t love you because you were devoted to her. They want you in the present and future tense. They expect you from here on in to work hard, to be devoted. Start coasting and you roll backward.”
On Modeling:
“We men have to put our pride and egos and just say, ‘You know what? I need help,’” Gibson says. “Bring something to the table. To somebody who has the keys to whatever door you’re trying to go through, say, ‘Look, man, I have five keys of my own, but I’m trying to figure out how to get these other keys.’
Think of of it this way: Every man is surrounded by better men. A man who’s more financially secure than you are can teach you something, and chances are he can learn something from you. So approach him. Collaborate. Successful men aren’t symbols of your inferiority; they’re examples worth engaging.”
On Upgrading Your Peer Group:
“The five people you spend most of your time with will dictate how far your life and career will go. Slobs will make you a slob. Gibson loved fried calamari, and he had friends who bought it for him all the time. But if you’re friends work hard and eat right, you’ll be embarrassed to eat fried anything around them.
It isn’t easy to switch friends. Gibson knows that. It took him months: less time with this person, more time with that one. Scoops of fried calamari gave way to scoops of tuna on lettuce, now his regular lunch. Guys at the gym taught him new exercises. He runs five miles a day on a treadmill. He lifts regularly.”
I liked this for a number of reasons. One, it reinforces things I already know, which is always good. But, two, this series also gives us a chance to model someone who has been there. As embarrassing at it may sound, something tells me that I may have to start spending more time at Borders lurking in the magazine section!
So far so good: Over-scheduled! Update
I got up this morning, late and feeling tired. Instead of sticking to yesterday’s plan, I immediately started working and then when I realized that I wouldn’t get in a full hour of exercise, I decided to skip the workout. I worked some more and then thought: What the heck are you doing?! You know you have a tough day ahead, get up and get to the gym. Less is better than nothing! I threw my exercise clothes on, packed a bag and was out the door in 15 minutes. I got to the gym at 7:15, got on the elliptical — my four favorite cardio machines were unavailable, which I also found irritating– at 7:20, plugged in 40 minutes.
So, I only burned 375 calories instead of 550. It was better than nothing.
I took a quick shower, grabbed my computer, and headed to the dinner.
Immediately, I was tempted by the “Healthy Option: Light Multigrain Waffle filled with Oats and Walnuts, Served with Fresh Strawberries, Real Vermont Butter and Maple Syrup.” (I’d hate to see the Unhealthy Options — oh yeah, that would be the rest of the menu). My bad. I was particularly tempted when a waitress brought one to the woman sitting less than two feet to my right. It looked — and smelled — delicious!
With much gritting of the teeth, I decided, believe it or not, to stick with the plan. I ordered (and eventually enjoyed) my bowl of fresh fruit and pot of orange spice herbal tea, not to mention the conversation with the visiting scholar.
Now, you may be wondering if was “the plan” that kept me from ordering the “Healthy Option” as opposed to the pre-planned bowl of fruit. I’m not so sure to tell you the truth. But having thought about the challenges facing me before hand and actually writing it out was a powerful exercise. Though, it may have been the pseudo-calorie calculation I did, which put the waffle at 400 calories — that is, 400 without the butter, strawberries, or syrup — versus my 100 calorie fruit bowl, which I knew from experience was comprised mostly of melon!
On to the pub.
So a few hours later, I head over the pub with my students. From a health perspective, the menu was horrifying.
I ordered a spinach salad and added salmon. Hands down: the worst lunch/dinner salad I’ve ever had.
The spinach was wilted (and not in a warm spinach salad sort of way, but rather in a I’ve been sitting in a plastic bag for a week sort of way) and the salmon was so dry and salty that it stuck to my tongue.
Now, normally I try to avoid what nutrition coach Sonni Tallent refers to as “Ick” food (or food that you’ve had in the fridge a day — or three — too long, but you eat it anyway because it’s there), but in this case, I was hungry and my students had invited me. Besides, the conversation was awesome, and sometimes that’s all that really matters. I picked through the salad and left half of the salmon on the plate.
As soon as I left, I went back to the office and downed 16 ounces of Perfect Food (as a detoxing move) and 16 ounces of herbal tea. Note to self: drink way more water than normal before going to bed!
So, to my best guess, I have consumed 850 calories, which leaves me with 650 for the banquet later this evening. Hopefully I can keep it under 500, so I can go home and have the dessert of my choice. If not, I’ll either skip dessert or have it anyway!
So, what did I learn?
On challenging days, it’s good to try to think them through the day before and do your level best to stick to the plan to the best of your ability. And, if you’re anything like me (who tends to have an all or nothing attitude) it’s also a good idea to try to stick to them as long as you can — as who knows what might have happened had I derailed myself early by either failing to go to the gym or ordering the waffle (or both).
The really important thing to note, however, is that I wasn’t “perfect,” at any point at the day. I didn’t exercise the amount I wanted to. I really had to think long and hard about not getting the waffle. And I had something for lunch that had enough salt in it to preserve a horse.
But I was close at each stage of the game.
More importantly, I was closer than I would have been if I hadn’t thought it through and had a plan to which I felt at least marginally accountable.
The good news is that I’m sure that the certainty that I have gained in my ability to navigate obstacles and to make the healthiest choices I can will see me safely – and happily — through dinner, not to mention any of the other myriad of opportunities to overeat that I have facing me in the coming weeks!
Getting Real About Calories
As I have been talking with various people about diet and weight loss, I’ve come to realize that most people have no idea how many calories that they’re eating in a meal, let alone in a day. So it seems to me that the number one thing that people need to do is get aware of what (and how much) they’re putting in their mouth and how much effort at the gym (or wherever) it’s going to take to get it off their hips!
There have been a number of studies lately about how good people are at estimating the number of calories things have in them; and guess what? It depends! But some interesting trends are apparent. Thin people tend to be more accurate when estimating the number of calories in a meal, whereas overweight people tend to underestimate them. Interesting? Well, it gets better. As it turns out, this really has nothing to do with body weight, but rather that people (regardless of weight) tend to be better at estimating small meals rather than large meals. And overweight people tend to eat larger meals than thinner people. So, hidden tip: Eat smaller meals!
So, how does one go about getting real about calories?
I recently stumbled across this website, where someone had taken photographs of everything in their kitchen that amounted to 200 calories, just to get an idea of what 200 calories actually looked like. Notice the tiny blob of my personal favorite–peanut butter–compared to the platter of kiwi!!
Another way is to simply keep a detailed food diary (meaning amounts as well as items) and to do a quick calorie count. There are a ton of calorie counting websites out there. My personal favorites are Calorie King, Calorie Count, and the Daily Plate. Though sometimes I just type in the words “beets calories” –that is, I’m eating beets–and Google will take me right where I need to be.
My personal strategy is to create an excel book with three worksheets.
The first sheet is the things that I tend to eat over and over (or things I make by recipe). I got the calorie counts for these all in one setting, because I know that I will be entering them over and over.
The second sheet is titled, Food and Exercise. This is where I do the calories in and the calories out.
On the third worksheet, Daily Totals, I add the calories burned in daily exercise to my personal BMR x 1.1 (because I have a relatively sedentary lifestyle) and subtract the calories I consume. On this page, I also keep track of my weigh-ins and my measurements.
Although I hated keeping a traditional food diary when I was in Weight Watchers, I get a tremendous amount of pleasure with my excel sheet. Maybe it’s the little kid in me that used to sit around and play with the adding machine!
Now, Michael is not a fan of the excel sheet; he’s much more techie than I am! He’s got an iPhone and he is a huge fan of the app, Lose-It. Unfortunate name, but a marvelous tracking device. Not only does it keep track of your calories, it also keeps track of your nutrients! Besides that, it’s super easy to use and it gives you an excuse to whip out your iPhone at dinner, which in most men’s worlds, is always a plus!
Now notice that I keep track of my calories burned just as I do the calories consumed. This is essential. Because there’s nothing more sobering than getting off a spinning bike after an hour of hard work and realizing, wow, all that effort and I just barely worked off that impulse scone from Panera.
Once you get real about about calories–that is, how easy it is to eat them and how much effort it takes to use them–it’s easier to make choices that support your goals instead of those that undermine them!
Defining Success
After an hour of aerobic conditioning, I stepped on the scale: 143.2! I had gained 2.2 pounds! Ouch!
“That was fast,” my little voice snarked. “I knew it wasn’t maintainable!”
Ignoring it, I quickly ran through a little checklist:
Had I put anything in my body that was not serving my goals? No.
Had I put too much of anything in my body that was not serving my goals? No.
Had I continued doing what I know works? Yes.
Had I had anything salty for dinner? No.
What date was it? Bingo!
Given the nature of bodies (especially female bodies), not to mention the inconsistencies of measuring devices, I have decided to define success–that is, successful maintenance–as staying within 3 pounds of my target weight (either way).
In other words, like any good statistician, I have given myself a margin of error. As long as I stay within that six pound spread (which is a pretty generous spread) I’m golden.
No why would I do that? Because weighing alone is not reliable. Having an acceptable range (as opposed to number) will prevent me from freaking out or defining myself as a failure and then, either tacitly or explicitly, giving myself permission to quit.
This way, when I hit that upper three pound threshold, I simply know that I need to reduce my calories again. When I go too low, I know that I need to add in more calories of the type that I had been eating when I was losing–that is, fresh fruits and vegetables, whole grains, etc. This does not mean that I just get to start adding in junk. And this most certainly does not mean that I get to dive head first into a jar of peanut butter!
So, I am at the upper end of the threshold; does this mean I need to stop eating or go back to the gym? Does this mean I should quit and see if I can get those 10s back from Talbots? No, it simply means I need to reduce my calories by about 300 a day and see that tomorrow brings.
I’ll keep you posted.
The Office Candy Jar
Most of us have them; they’re typically perched on a desk in the main thruway. I must walk by ours every day at least two dozen times. In the good old days, I used to grab a piece (or two, or three). Luckily, we have hard candy now (as opposed to the mini-Hershey bars that I used to delude myself about) and it’s easier to resist. But I still would pick up my requisite handful (some days one at a time, sometimes two at a time).
I started thinking about it and ran a couple of quick calculations.
The candy in our office candy bowl has approximately 24 calories per piece. Not so bad, right?
If you had one piece of hard candy every work day (252 work days a year), you’re consuming 6,048 calories of refined sugar a year; that’s 1.73 lbs.
But who just eats one? Two pieces a day is 12,096 calories a year: 3.47 lbs.
And my personal favorite (and I’ll stop here)–four pieces a day: 6.91 lbs a year! And that’s from the hard candy–butterscotch, peppermint, cinnamon disk variety that no one really likes. That’s all from stuff that you eat just because it’s there!
I cringe when I think about the years that we had mini-snickers, for example.
Again, let’s look at the numbers for those:
1 a day: 3.24 lbs a year
2 a day: 6.48 lbs a year
4 a day (because they’re really not that big, right?): 12.96 lbs a year!
I’m not saying that you shouldn’t eat them, but just think about it before you pop one into your mouth!
A New Spin on Accountability
I’m not sure how it works, but it might be interesting for those people who need a little bit of incentive, in any area of their life: StickK.
